Learning, worries and being bored

After thinking about what I wanted to write about for my next blog entry I realized I always focus on the grand things, the special moments, the out of the ordinary days. What is most intriguing about unschooling in my point of view though are the differences on a day to day scale, how incredibly varied our daily lives are. How people within the (school) system can not imagine what it is like to not have to get up, to not wait for somebody to tell you what to do, to live by your own rythms and ideas.

To not have anybody to blame for things but yourself.

All of last week for example we did almost nothing. For an outsider it looked like the kids were super lazy, glued to the screen, not moving around much, going outside only if forced, not wanting to do anything „educational“. Honestly, I sometimes catch myself getting worried. I worry what others might think if they see us like this: Wearing PJ’s at eleven in the morning, eating lunch sometime around four, the kids playing minecraft for ten hours straight.

But then I look closer.

I see children who have just come home from a week filled with play, laughter, swimming, visits to the museum, playgrounds, friends, the zoo. They just spent a weekend with about twenty other kids of all ages at an unschooler festival where they did not eat, sleep or rest at all. Instead they took over the entertainment program for the younger children, self motivated and by their own idea. They learned new skills, they met new friends, they were constantly learning in an absolutely nourishing, bountiful environment.

We need a break.

It is of the most importance for young people, but in general for all of us humans, to take time to digest. To have days where outwardly nothing is going on, days to be lazy, to be bored out of our wits. We all are made to live by these natural rythms. Stressful periods interchange with times to rest and process. Look at nature: After hunting follows resting, after summer and fall harvests follow quiet winter months of hibernation.

All too often this living by natural rythms is not possible in our modern world. We believe we need to constantly run. The effect of this lifestyle being stressed out, tired people. Your only choices are to either block out what’s going on around you or burn out. Many cannot even stop running any more, even if they get the chance.

So I look even closer at my children.

I see that they leave their tablets after hours on end to want to cook a meal for all of us all by themselves. Our eleven year old working intensely on his new song. Our eight year old learning how to cut movies. I observe our four year old experimenting with letters by writing countless „letters“ to her siblings and parents. I watch our toddler building with the wooden blocks, finding out about gravity and balance, rules of construction. I see the little things happening at all times, almost invisible to the untrained eye.

What does it mean, to learn?

More than what is to the eye they learn things I cannot see, judge, measure. They interact with members of their family, they have relationships with friends, guests, helpers, our H.O.F.mates. They take their time to build their own picture of the world around them, they need that time to make sense of all of that.

By enabling that they gain a thourough understanding of their life and their surroundings. This is real, sustainable learning as far removed from „bulemia learning“ happening in most school settings as it can get. In fact, it cannot even be compared and it is a shame there aren’t two different terms for it.

So…relax!

I do not know what it is they are working on at any given moment, but it is also not my job to constantly evaluate. I am the facilitator. I am the gardener making sure they have water, sun, time to develop and the space to grow into something they were meant to be. They are thriving, they are learning. Always.

Cheers to that!

K.